Come this weekend, I will be 100% school free! This week, I've got to finish up my final exams and turn in some last minute assignments, but then I'll be done. It will be such a weight off my shoulders.. I think I shall celebrate with PF Chang's this weekend.. and bring my Mom.. since she's never been. So Mom, if you're reading this, what do you think about this weekend? You're gonna love it.. Their food is SO good!! :)
I think we've come to the decision that we are not going to continue to "try" for a baby this summer. I am so close to graduating, that I think it's in everyone's best interest that we put it on hold until August/September. That way, the earliest I will be due would be after I graduate.
I really don't feel like this is a set back for us.. Mainly because I still am not ovulating. I'll wait another month to see if I ovulate on my own, like my Dr. suggested, but I just have a feeling that it's not going to happen on it's own. I plan on giving her a call at the beginning of June. Then we'll have June, July, and possibly August to do any other treatments, toss around ideas, etc. Guess we'll just see how it all pans out..
I had an interesting conversation with my boss today. About infertility. We got on the subject because I was in her office with another co-worker who knows that my boss and I are unable to have children (her permanently, me (hopefully!) not permanently). He was asking us if there was ever a time when the doctors would suggest that we quit trying, etc. Anyways, the conversation went to all the people in the world who are able to have children and he was saying how it's crazy that here are two people (my boss and I) who want children so badly, but are unable to. Then there are all these other people who are, frankly, unfit to have children and care for them. I've heard of quite a few people that I went to highschool with that are either pregnant or have had children. These are the girls who haven't settled down, party all the time, and ended up getting pregnant with a dead beat boyfriend.. heck, they may not even be their "boyfriend". And the thing the keep advertising on their myspace pages is how they can't wait for the baby to be born, so they can go out and party again.
It just isn't fair.. and I know that life isn't fair, but really.
Yet, in all of this, I am at peace for now. Peace that I think it is a good idea for us to put it on hold. I need to get through school. Before, it wasn't much of a concern because graduation was a ways off and I could always go back. But now.. I have one semester left and clinicals.
I just hope that our plan works out in the end. I would love to be due in May, June, or July of 2009. Can things be a little easier for me? Can my wish please come true? I want things to go my way for once..
But for now.. I am content. I am happy.
The Gift of an Expressive Father
4 days ago