Monday, April 28, 2008

Relaxation is coming...

Come this weekend, I will be 100% school free! This week, I've got to finish up my final exams and turn in some last minute assignments, but then I'll be done. It will be such a weight off my shoulders.. I think I shall celebrate with PF Chang's this weekend.. and bring my Mom.. since she's never been. So Mom, if you're reading this, what do you think about this weekend? You're gonna love it.. Their food is SO good!! :)

I think we've come to the decision that we are not going to continue to "try" for a baby this summer. I am so close to graduating, that I think it's in everyone's best interest that we put it on hold until August/September. That way, the earliest I will be due would be after I graduate.
I really don't feel like this is a set back for us.. Mainly because I still am not ovulating. I'll wait another month to see if I ovulate on my own, like my Dr. suggested, but I just have a feeling that it's not going to happen on it's own. I plan on giving her a call at the beginning of June. Then we'll have June, July, and possibly August to do any other treatments, toss around ideas, etc. Guess we'll just see how it all pans out..

I had an interesting conversation with my boss today. About infertility. We got on the subject because I was in her office with another co-worker who knows that my boss and I are unable to have children (her permanently, me (hopefully!) not permanently). He was asking us if there was ever a time when the doctors would suggest that we quit trying, etc. Anyways, the conversation went to all the people in the world who are able to have children and he was saying how it's crazy that here are two people (my boss and I) who want children so badly, but are unable to. Then there are all these other people who are, frankly, unfit to have children and care for them. I've heard of quite a few people that I went to highschool with that are either pregnant or have had children. These are the girls who haven't settled down, party all the time, and ended up getting pregnant with a dead beat boyfriend.. heck, they may not even be their "boyfriend". And the thing the keep advertising on their myspace pages is how they can't wait for the baby to be born, so they can go out and party again.

It just isn't fair.. and I know that life isn't fair, but really.

Yet, in all of this, I am at peace for now. Peace that I think it is a good idea for us to put it on hold. I need to get through school. Before, it wasn't much of a concern because graduation was a ways off and I could always go back. But now.. I have one semester left and clinicals.
I just hope that our plan works out in the end. I would love to be due in May, June, or July of 2009. Can things be a little easier for me? Can my wish please come true? I want things to go my way for once..

But for now.. I am content. I am happy.

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

My Head Hurts

I am sitting at my desk, taking a "smoke break". I don't smoke, but I figure that the smokers around this office take at least an hour of smoke breaks a day, so my 5 to 10 minute breaks here and there are just fine.
I'm listening to coworkers talk about 401k. It's that time of the month where it's time to move your money around, if you so chose. We pretty much all follow each other. It starts with the stock know it all of the company and travles down from one person to the next. If I really had the extra time, I would educate myself on the topic. But for the moment, I just go with the flow.. Some quarters are better than others, but I'm still young.. I've got time for it to rebound.
I'm meeting a couple of classmates tonight to study for a test we've got coming up in a week or so. I don't feel like going, but I'd feel bad backing out at the last moment. I honestly don't have much to bring to the table because I haven't had the extra time to study lately for this class. There are other assignments that take importance over this, for the moment. Not to say that I don't need to worry about this class.. because I certainly do! We're meeting at a restaurant and I wonder how long they will put up with us after we've eaten.. just sitting there, taking up space for their business, while we're studying.. But on the other hand, it shouldn't be too busy due to the fact that it's a week night. There was talk of staying for three hours, but I am planning on staying there for two hours, at the most. I'm just exhausted today.
5 more days.. 5 more school days.. not counting weekends or exam days. I get out on Wednesday.. and then have exams until the end of the month. May 1st will be my first, school free day of the summer! I will be free for 4 months!! I CANNOT wait.
I'm looking forward to having time to exercise and get into shape, go to the tanning bed to ultimately lay out at the pool, clean my house on a regular basis, and cook decent meals! Bring on the summer!

Monday, April 7, 2008

Is this what it's like to have kids?

Yesterday was a day of cleaning, laundry, and relaxing.. I had just pulled out the freshly dried sheets and comforter from the dryer and put them on the bed. We then went to bed.. I wasn't sleeping too good.. My allergies were bothering me, due to a day of gardening and hours outside, so I had running eyes, an even runnier nose, and a massive headache.
While drifting in and out of sleep, I was completely awaken by the sounds of heaving and gagging. Both of our dogs sleep with us and the bigger one had gotten sick. I quickly sat up to see if he was ok, at which time, he vomited not once, but twice all over the bed.. Need I mention, the freshly cleaned blanket. This wasn't just the typical spitty dog vomit.. It was nasty!
I quickly woke my Husband up and we stripped the bed and got a new blanket.. I then had to coax our dog back onto the bed to let him know that it was ok and that he wasn't in trouble.
Needless to say, I didn't sleep too well after that.. I woke up this morning with an even bigger headache and went into the living room to find that our other dog had thrown up as well.. Guess neither of them were feeling well.. Although I can't think of anything out of the ordinary that they ate yesterday. I then had to sit through an hour of class and then come into work.
Thankfully, it's pretty slow at work today.. But my boss has given me the task of planning a baby shower for a coworker. Needless to say, this isn't exactly what I'd like to be doing, since I don't want to be around babies or "baby" things.. Oh well.. I'll just suck it up and do it. My boss struggles with infertility and cannot have children at all, so I know it's hard for her as well to have to be involved in these activites as well. At least I've still got a chance at becoming pregnant.. Which I hope happen sooner, rather than later..
This is the first month that I will be tracking ovulation. This is our next step in the treatment process.. My doctor wants me to monitor and see if I can ovulate on my own over these next few months.. Let's hope that I do and that a pregnancy results! :)

Tuesday, April 1, 2008 it is.

I have a pregnant co worker that sits near me.. She was complaining today about how her feet are swollen and she doesn't understand why they make maternity clothes, but not maternity shoes. I might add that I would typically not be annoyed at this, but since she complains about everything known to mankind, it has begun to grate on my ever loving nerves. If it's not heart burn, it's her back.. She's just "ready to get this kid out of her".
So, I smartly remarked on the fact that some people just have naturally fat feet and I wonder how they find shoes that fit them well? Her current shoes are too small so she has taken to wearing sandals and took one off today and couldn't put it back on.. So, I told her that I would make a website of maternity shoes. It shall be called And I will become rich because I got an idea from her constant complaining.